Just Maybe

A few years ago, I had just come home from work, and my kids, Rachel (5), Heidi (7), and Jimmie (8), ran up to meet me for their customary hugs and kisses. The children then followed me into the house and the bathroom. I noticed that one side of the curtain, rod and all, had been pulled out of the wall. The window was small and high, and on the floor, beneath it was a hot water baseboard heater. It was apparent that one of the kids had stood on the heater, grabbed the curtain to pull him or herself up so he or she could look out the window, and tore the rod out of the wall.

Now I must explain that being the monster that I am, I told the kids as they were growing up that if I ever caught them lying or stealing, they would, without a doubt, get a spanking and that I would never spank them if they told the truth. So I turned and looked at all three of them standing there and said, “Who pulled the curtain down? Jimmie, did you do it?”

He shook his head and said, “I didn’t do it.”

“Heidi, did you do it?” Same reaction and also, “I didn’t do it.”

Rachel stood there, with a guilty-as-sin look on her face, as I turned to her and asked, “Did you do it?” She looked me right in the eye and said, as she put her hands on her hips and her weight on one foot, “Maybe I did [then she shifted her weight to the other foot], and maybe I didn’t.”